At least make sure they are 18
Why
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
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