hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
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