So drunk its hurt
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Randomize
