Do you still have your period?
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
