I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
only you would photoshop your dick
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Randomize