Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize