Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
