you turned your livingroom into a bong?
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
My vagina is very pro this idea
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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