I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize
