remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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