Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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