What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Randomize