would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
