is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
