Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
