why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
