yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Randomize
