So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
