who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
My bed smells like the plague
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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