dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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