physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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