he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
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