I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I just want to make out with him forever
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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