If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize