Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Randomize
