You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
