I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
