There is no way he is gay with that hair.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Randomize
