I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
Life is so much better after having sex.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Randomize
