sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
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