3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Randomize
