She said her name was "party"
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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