Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Randomize