R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Randomize
