there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
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