Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
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