it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
