Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
you win again, gameday.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
