I CAN MOONWALK!
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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