I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
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