I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Randomize
