glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
