My Higher Power is John Stamos
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
