yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
Randomize
