He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
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