I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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