Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
