tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
