what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
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