and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Randomize
