That's when you crack a 10am beer
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
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