This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
You need Xanax blowdarts
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
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