Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Randomize
